...offered by Dn. James Ferrenberg, a sinner at 7:03 AM [+]
Evidence for the invasion was publicized while I was in Uganda and while the UN was apparently - as usual - worrying over something of lessor importance. Pouring over our borders with impunity, these invaders came to rob us of our humble resources and, adhering to a terrorist ideology, they came also with the intent of destroying our property, creating fires using improvised electrical wires as a means of arson, and spreading horrible diseases. They must be stopped!
Some amongst us claim they come because we first invaded their land...or that because of our world-wide empire building, they are justified in their little rebellion. They claim we must try and understand them and work to reconcile our differences. They worry that in our zeal we may become that which we fight against, that we might round up the "innocent" among them and hide them away from PETA in secret facilities where we will torture them to try and learn where they have hidden their little terrorist cells.
Yes, these enemy-loving bleeding hearts have no knowledge of history and have forgotten the horrors this same fanatical breed (in collusion with their blood sucking comrades) unleashed upon us centuries ago when fully 1/4 of the West was wiped out. These "peace"-lovers have even infiltrated Hollywood and have begun to indoctrinate our children with revisionist lies, even portraying our evil enemies as kind, loving, "people" who also happen to be exquisite cooks...how fitting such films are set in France!
Well, I say fret not...for I have instituted a policy of NO QUARTER....NO PARLEY! Shoot on sight...kill them all and let God sort them out. And I have brought forth the very latest weapon that our glorious military-industrial complex can create, with no heed paid to those who would insist upon "humane" methods or the application of habeas corpus to non-citizens enemy combatants:
My friends...I invite you to stay tuned as the battle has already begun and I will bring to you continuing news of our glorious struggle against these, our most ancient of enemies. I believe our fight will dwarf THIS great and tragic struggle...God willing we will prevail!
Grab your pellet guns and join us in this fight to free our barn from the occupation! Let freedom ring!